New Living Translation (NLT)
Instruction on Marriage
7 Now regarding the questions you asked in your letter. Yes, it is good to abstain from sexual relations.[a] 2 But because there is so much sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband.
3 The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. 4 The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife.
5 Do not deprive each other of sexual relations, unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward, you should come together again so that Satan won’t be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
I was gonna wait for a little while before diving into this subject. But, I figured, why not? I mean hey, I’m sure someone was wondering and there’s no use in ignoring the matter – I mean, we’re all grown right? Now, here is where I give my “gentle ears and eyes” declaration. IF YOU STRUGGLE WITH SEXUAL SIN, IF YOU ARE TRYING TO STAY CELIBATE AND SEX TALK AROUSES YOU PLEASE DO NOT READ THIS UNTIL YOU CAN PROPERLY, UNDER GOD, ENGAGE IN THIS ACTIVITY. There, I said it. If you are going to have problems, these next few posts will not be the posts for you. Come back to it later.
Now, on with the show. In the next three writings, I’m going to talk about 3 things that have been “plaguing” the Christian community. First, we will just go ahead and get oral sex out of the way. Second, we will discuss masturbation. Last, we will talk about the sin of “with holding” sex. I’m not going to get into anything else because frankly, we are all grown and we all know how sex works. We all also know that sex is suppose to be between MARRIED MEN and WOMEN – nothing more, nothing less. There is no allowance for threesomes, no homosexual sex, no fornication. There is no allowance for rape between a husband and wife. And since we know that, we won’t discuss it. And if we DON’T know that…well….frankly, now you do and you need to do further biblical research.
So, let’s jump on the proverbial horse and get started shall we?
Oral Sex. This has been a huge hot topic lately. Frankly, I don’t understand why. There are many pastors/preachers/Christians that will condemn a married couple for pleasing each other how they see fit. Here’s my personal opinion – Three’s a crowd. You married your husband, not your husband and your pastor et al. Here’s my wisdom - Think of it this way, while you are trying to please your pastor and his opinion, you are now depriving your OWN husband (1 Cor. 7:2) of fulfilling HIS needs (1 Cor. 7:3) causing what could be frustration and angst in your own marriage. All the while, your pastor is doing God knows what with his wife to make her happy, swinging from the chandeliers in pink underwear and such that you don’t know about. To be honest, there is NOTHING condemning married people in the bible for having oral sex. To not do it is a matter of preference. To engage in it is also preference. You are not a bad person or have a bad marriage either way. Many people would consider it perverted and vile – even homosexual behavior. And to them, I say – be careful of how you speak of your Creator. For, oral sex is plainly talked about in the bible as a beautiful thing. And to call that perverted is to call God perverted….are you ready to answer for that? Let’s explore….
Song of Solomon 1:12
New Living Translation (NLT)
Young Woman
12 The king is lying on his couch, enchanted by the fragrance of my perfume.
(here is a hint, she is not talking about Chanel #5)
Song of Solomon 2:3
New Living Translation (NLT)
Young Woman
3 Like the finest apple tree in the orchard is my lover among other young men.
I sit in his delightful shade and taste his delicious fruit.
(If you are sitting in someone’s shade, you are more than likely beneath them. Aaaaand, I don’t think that men literally grow fruit)
Song of Solomon 2:16
New Living Translation (NLT)
Young Woman
16 My lover is mine, and I am his. He browses among the lilies.
(Nope, not those kind of lilies – that wouldn’t even make sense.)
Song of Solomon 4:16
New Living Translation (NLT)
Young Woman
16 Awake, north wind! Rise up, south wind! Blow on my garden and spread its fragrance all around. Come into your garden, my love taste its finest fruits.
(Nope, not talking about the act of pollination)
Song of Solomon 8:2
New Living Translation (NLT)
2 I would bring you to my childhood home, and there you would teach me.[a] I would give you spiced wine to drink,my sweet pomegranate wine.
(Well, there you have it.)
Now, let’s understand, this is poetry from one lover to the other, so it won’t be “raunchy” like the latest Zane novel. But you do get the point. Euphemisms abound in this book full of love, passion, and erotic wantings.
So, you see, God never condemned oral sex. In fact, if He did, we wouldn't be allowed to kiss our husbands, to nibble on their ear, to suck their neck, or what ever else you chose to do to them with your mouths. Simply, to not do it is just a matter of personal preference. But, may I mind you, that this is something that you and your husband should BOTH feel comfortable with. Yes, the bible does say that your body no longer belongs to you and his no longer belongs to him. But what “fun” is being intimate if either of you are uncomfortable? Whatever you decide as a couple, make sure that you pray and seek the Lord about it first. He is the only one that should be allowed in your bedroom – not your pastor or other outside influences.
Let’s discuss!!
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